HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Most of us have received the following joke memo in our inboxes, but we thought it would be fun to reprint it here. We can all identify with the frustration of planning a work event. Enjoy!
The Editor

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Human Resources Christmas Memo

December 1
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I am happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue. There will be lots of spiked eggnog and a small band playing traditional carols ... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus to light the Christmas tree! Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Patty Lewis
Human Resources Director

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December 2
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday that often coincides with Christmas (though unfortunately not this year). However, from now on we are calling it our "Holiday Party". The same policy applies to employees who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols sung.

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Patty Lewis
Human Resources Director

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December 3
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Regarding the anonymous note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, I am happy to accommodate this request, but don't forget, if I put a sign on the table that reads "AA Only", you won't be anonymous any more. In addition, forget about the gifts exchange-no gifts will be allowed since the union members feel that $10 is too much money.

Patty Lewis
Human Researchers Director

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December 7
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I have arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with the gay men; each group will have its own table. Yes, there will be a flower arrangement for the gay men's table. Happy now?

Patty Lewis
Human Racehorses Director

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December 9
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

People, people-nothing sinister was intended by wanting our CEO to play Santa Claus! Even if the anagram of "Santa" does happen to be "Satan", there is no evil connotation to our own "little man in a red suit".

Patty Lewis
Human Ratraces

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December 10
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Vegetarians - I've had it with you people!! We are going to hold this party at Luigi's Open Pit whether you like it or not. You can just sit at the table farthest from the "grill of death", as you put it, and you will get salad bar only, including hydroponic tomatoes. But, you know, tomatoes have feelings too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them right now... HA! I hope you all have a rotten holiday, you hear me?

The ***** from Hell

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December 14
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I am sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her stress-related illness. I will continue to forward your cards to her at the sanitarium. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay. Happy Holidays!

Terri Bishop
Acting Human Resources Director


Post your NURSE position free on Longwoods.com!


From the HR Resources Database ....

Employers' Liquor Liability: Paternalistic Obligations or Personal Responsibility?
Shelley Timms

Abstract:
Employers are regularly changing their approaches to conducting business including their relationships with employees often as a result of prompting from the courts. Today, benefits often include an employee assistance program; and alcohol and drug policies are a necessary part of the company manual. At the same time, a part of maintaining employee morale is providing firm events such as a Christmas party or summer picnic during which alcohol is served. At one time, each person was responsible for his or her own consumption and while taxi chits or hotel accommodation might be offered to prevent people from driving after drinking, the function was considered to be a perk, not part of employment responsibilities. Safe drinking was the responsibility of the employee.


FROM THE LONGWOODS ARCHIVES

Healthcare Quarterly, 5(2) 2001: 25-26
ICES Report: Is There A Doctor in The Emergency Department?
Ben Chan

Abstract:
Ensuring that there are enough physicians to staff the emergency department (ED) is a major issue for hospital managers. According to a recent ICES Practice Atlas on ED Services in Ontario (Chan et al.2001), this task may become increasingly difficult. From fiscal year 1993 to 2000 , the number of physicians working in EDs declined by 21%, from 2,525 to 1,987.

The Damage Done
Randy Bundus

Abstract:
To what extent are managers and supervisors responsible for the safety of employees who choose to drink at staff functions? How is liability apportioned when a person drives drunk and injures or kills himself or herself or others, after an office event? These questions have formed the backdrop for many recent legal cases on employer liquor liability

Subscribe to any of the Longwoods journals here.


Rouge Valley Wins Provincial Award - Women's and children's health program wins 2009 Innovation Award for Innovations in Health Human Resources


Today's Nurse Jobs:

Clinical Resource Nurse (RN) - Hamilton
RN Opportunities are available in Barrie and area
RPN Opportunities are available in Wasaga Beach
Registered Nurses - Hospice Caledon
RN & RPN positions - Homewood Health Centre, Guelph, ON
Exciting Nursing Careers at Interior Health, BC
Registered Practical Nurses - Opportunities are available in Newmarket, Richmond Hill & Thornhill
Opportunities in the new Complex Respiratory Care Program
Opportunities for RN's in the Chronic Health Care Program
Registered Nurses, OBS/Rehab - West Parry Sound Health Centre
Registered Practical Nurses - Durham Region, Fairview Lodge - Whitby, ON
Registered Practical Nurses - Durham Region, Lakeview Manor - Beaverton, ON
RN, Diabetic Education Centre, Centenary Site - RVHS, Scarborough, ON
Nurse Practitioner Clinical Director - Central East CCAC
Positions available across Canada for RNs; RPNs; LPNs
Your Life's Work…In Our Piece of Paradise - VIHA, Vancouver Island, BC
Six (6) Permanent PT RNs, Medicine Care - NBGH, North Bay, ON
Three (3) Permanent Pt Rns, Complex Continuing Care/Rehabilitation - NBGH, North Bay, ON
Six (6) Permanent PT RNs, Medicine Care - NBGH, North Bay, ON
Two (2) Permanent FT RNs + Two (2) Temporary FT RNs +One (1) Permanent PT RN, Acute Inpatient Psychiatry Unit - NBGH, North Bay, ON
Three (3) Permanent PT RNs, Surgery Care Centre - NBGH, North Bay, ON
Registered Nurse - The Royal Ottawa Mental Health Centre
Registered Nurses - Opportunities in London / Middlesex & Huron County
Palliative / Oncology Nurses (RNs) - North Simcoe Muskoka (Based in Barrie)
Occupational Health Nurse - Rouge Valley Health System , Ajax, ON
Paediatric RNs in Wellington County including: Guelph, Puslinch, Clifford, Palmerston, Mount Forest and Erin
Mental Health Nurses in Wellington County including: Guelph, Puslinch, Clifford, Mount Forest & Palmerston
Nurse Practitioner - Adult - Mental Health Program - St. Michael's Hospital, Toronto, ON
Clinical Nurse Specialist - Trauma & Neurosurgery - St. Michael's Hospital, Toronto, ON
RN opportunities are available in Peel & Halton Region including Mississauga, Brampton, Etobicoke, Oakville and Milton
Registered Nurses - Opportunities in Lanark, Leeds & Grenville including: Smiths Falls, Napanee and Perth
Registered Practical Nurses - Opportunities in Port Hope and Cobourg area
RNs & RPNs - Opportunities in Ottawa & Eastern Counties: including: Nepean, Carleton Place, Cornwall, Glengarry and Rockland
Registered Practical Nurses - Opportunities in Niagara Region including: Niagara Falls, Welland, St. Catharines & Port Colborne
Community RNs for the Home Chemotherapy Team - Peel Region - Mississauga & Brampton
And more ..

For other positions in Healthcare, go to the Longwoods Healthcare JobSheet.

Healthcare Facilities are invited to post positions for Front Line Nurses on theFind a Nurse web page. Recruiting agencies can post a nursing position free on Find a Nurse if they are also posting a leadership position on the Longwoods Healthcare JobSheet.

Here's how it works - email the words in a Word document to Susan Hale. We will post the nursing ad on this web page at no charge. Find a Nurse will be promoted in the Longwoods eLetter, which goes out every Tuesday morning to over 40,000+ healthcare readers.

The small print: Please send only one position per posting. The postings can be up to 150 words, plus URL to the webpage of your choice. There will be no charge for Front Line Nursing positions. For all other positions, please contact Susan Hale for rates and details or see the information here.


CAREERS: sent to +40,000 people including Canada's student nurses.

Today's Leadership Positions
Vice President, Prevention and Screening Programs - Cancer Care Ontario, Toronto, ON
Vice President, HR & Organizational Development - Mental Health Centre Penetanguishene, ON
Senior Program Consultant, Labs - MOHLTC, Toronto, ON
President & CEO - Credit Valley Hospital Foundation, Mississauga, ON
Program Director Surgery - Humber River Regional Hospital, Downsview, ON
Dean, Faculty of Health Sciences - Douglas College, New Westminster, BC
President and CEO - Winnipeg Regional Health Authority, Winnipeg, MB
CEO - Saskatchewan Cancer Agency, Regina, SK
Director of Residential Services - St. Joseph's General Hospital,Comox BC
Skilled Webmaster - Longwoods Publishing, Toronto, ON
Clinical Planning Analyst - Clinical Education - Sidra Medical & Research Center, the Doha Qatar
Career Opportunities at Strata Health
Career Opportunities at Northern Health
Career Opportunities at London Health Sciences
Career Opportunities at Alberta Health Services
Career Opportunities at Vancouver Coastal Health
Career Opportunities at Fraser Health

Visit our portal of more than 60 participating healthcare recruitment centres.
[Send your career opportunities to Susan Hale at shale@longwoods.com]


CONFERENCES & EVENTS

January 14, 2010:Toronto, ON. The Aging Workforce: Preparing for the Talent Crunch.As the baby boomers retire, analysts are warning about the fallout if shortages are allowed to materialize. Attend this conference and learn how you can seize the total labour pool. Details.

February 24-25, 2010: Toronto ON. The Hospitalist Model. As the hospitalist model has become more widely adopted, many of the challenges identified early on are being resolved, while others are reaching a critical stage. This informative two day event will explore common issues and provide practical solutions to real-word issues facing hospital medicine programs. Register before November 20th to save $200. Details.

February 25-26, 2010: Ottawa, ON. Healthy Workplaces in Action: Working Together to Deliver Quality Care. The 2010 QWQHC Summit is an excellent opportunity to increase your understanding of the importance of healthy workplace environments; learn from and be inspired by individuals and organizations taking action; strengthen networks and connect with colleagues to share experiences, practical strategies, and resources. Early bird deadline ends on November 30th. Register now by clicking here.


TRANSITIONS

December 15, 2009

Rik Ganderton will continue in the role of President and CEO of Rouge Valley Health System on a long-term basis
Christine Chadwick to HOK Health Care as Vice President and Market Sector Leader
Shona Elliott to Chatham-Kent Health Alliance as President and Chief Executive Officer
Dr. David Higgins to President of St. Joseph's Healthcare Hamilton
Andrew J White of IT World Canada Inc. passed away after an 18 month battle with cancer
Cameron Love, Vice-President, Planning, Support Services and Clinical Programs of The Ottawa Hospital (TOH) to interim CEO of the Community Care Access Centre, Ottawa
Dr. Michael Fehlings, Medical Director, Krembil Neuroscience Centre, recently won the Olivecrona Award for his research in the field of spinal cord injuries (SCI).

December 8, 2009

Carlos G. Dourado to President, Merck
Michael Mundy to Partner, Odgers Berndtson:
Thomas A. Bernes to Vice-President, The Center for International Governance Innovation
Mark Bain to Partner, Torys LLP
Paul Lévesque to Chair of the Board, Rx&D
Paul Lepage to Vice-President and General Manager, Healthcare Delivery solutions, TELUS
Dougal Macdonald to Vice Chair, Bloorview Kids Foundation, Toronto ON
Dr. Benjamin Alman to Vice-Chair, Bloorview Kids Foundation, Toronto ON
Tom Muir to Chair, Bloorview Kids Foundation, Toronto ON
Valerie McMurtry to President and CEO, Bloorview Kids Foundation, Toronto ON
Kathryn Giffen to Chair, Women's College Hospital, Toronto ON

Review all recently reported Transitions.

[Don't forget, we don't make these up. Please send your promotions, appointments, retirements and other transitions to publisher@longwoods.com.]

For a three-year searchable history of leadership transitions and appointments across the country, organized by date, here. Or visit Longwoods Transitions in Healthcare Blog for recent healthcare transitions.


Are you trying to recruit senior administrators? Are you looking for recognized leaders in healthcare? Do you need to recruit Nurses? Post your positions on the LONGWOODS HEALTHCARE JOBSHEET.

Our web traffic is pretty dynamic on Longwoods.com.

Number of pages visited per month [October 2009] - 728,397
Number of hits per month [October 2009] - 2,662,795
Number of visits per month [October 2009] - 295,986
Number of unique visitors per month [October 2009] - 69,270

Members of the Canadian Nursing Students' Association (CNSA) receive free online access to www.Longwoods.com, the Longwoods Healthcare JobSheet, and The Canadian Journal of Nursing Leadership (CJNL).

CNSA has selected the Canadian Journal of Nursing Leadership (CJNL) as their journal of choice as it contains peer-reviewed articles and they must reference peer reviewed articles in their courses. We also have more than 400 colleges and universities providing students worldwide online access to our publications.

Information regarding other recruiting rates can be found here.

Recruiters find the Longwoods Healthcare JobSheet gives very good return for healthcare positions. Posting is easy. Here are the details:

The JobSheet is simple: cheap, fast, efficient, & very effective.
Cost is $1.00 a word per week (net + gst). Minimum $75.00 (net + gst) per posting. Logos can be included for an additional $20.00 (net + gst) each.

Positions are posted on theJobSheet and promoted in the weekly Longwoods eLetter, which goes out every Tuesday morning to over 40,000+ healthcare readers. Archives.

Note: Discounts apply for multiple week postings (i.e. 10% for 2 weeks, 15% for 3 weeks, 20% for 4 weeks). Postings are billed per week based on word count. All of our recruiting rates are net.

Here's how it works - Send me the words and logo in a Word document. I will send you a quote, then I will post the ad online and send you a URL for proofing. We will invoice by mail unless a different method is requested.

Want to know more? Contact Susan Hale by email or call 416-864-9667 x 104.